Showing posts with label belief. Show all posts
Showing posts with label belief. Show all posts

Monday, October 6, 2014

FORTY YEARS AGO TODAY I LOST MY DAD

Forty years ago today, on a cold and dark Oct 6th  1974, my Dad tragically passed away from a massive heart attack.  He was only 40 years old!  I had just turned 14. There are no words to express the tragedy of my Dad’s passing and the chaos that my siblings and I went through as well as our Uncle Ron and Gram.  I started this post by writing about the details of the tragic day my Dad passed, but found that it was just too personal at this time and possibly too long of a story to tell.  All I can say is for me it was a nightmare that has had no end.


I want to share a story about my Dad from when I was a young girl. When I was in Home Economics class, I think it was 7th grade.  We had to go to the store to get fabric and decorative ribbon for a tote bag that we were making in class.  Well, my Dad took me to the fabric store on Rte. 37 just by Hooper Ave.  I don’t remember the name but I can clearly remember the building.  Well, anyhow, we went in to the store and we looked at the fabric. My Dad was in his element, ‘color’!  He was so good at picking out colors and matching them up to each other. I could see he was in heaven with color and patterns.  We chose a bright shocking fuschia color for the outside. We chose a tiny flower pattern for the inside that matched up so beautifully.  Then we picked out the ribbon for the handles and this is where my Dad came to life even more.  I remember the ribbon being about 2 inches wide and it was so beautiful with flowers and shades of pink, fuschia , purples and metallic thread on it. When I think back, it was the most expensive of all the ribbon like it, but Dad wanted me to get it.  He would not have it any other way. He said to me, “ this is the prettiest in the store and I think you should have it”!  So off to the cutting table we went.
I share this story because it is such a reflection of the man, Dad, toy designer and son he was. What Dad in 1973 took their daughter to the fabric store and picks out pink, fuschia and flower patterned fabric? He was so natural and like he was where he was supposed to be at that moment in time.  My Dad was there, because he knew he had to.  My heart was relying on it.
To this day I don’t know what happened to that tote bag.  I usually save important things from people I love and I do, have some of the fuschia fabric and it is Vintage 43 years old!
I miss my Dad and I think of him in some way everyday.  He was a hard Dad to forget.  As my Mom has passed now too,  I hope they are sharing a life together some where in heaven, or if not somewhere in the Universe.  Someday I will see him again, and we will  be able to talk shop!!
Cheers,
Loren
 



Friday, October 7, 2011

A NEW TO YOU YET SOMEWHAT OLDER PAINTING

THE BEAT OF THE HEART
OIL ON CANVAS  30x40
(c) Loren Fidalgo 2010

 I wanted to touch base with everyone and share a new yet old painting.  This painting is called "THE BEAT OF THE HEART". Initially, I wanted to title it, "THE WATCHER", however, I decided that the new title expresses more of my feelings about this painting.  What do you think?  
This painting is painted with oil on stretched canvas.  The size is 30 x 40 and one of my favorite sizes to paint on.

I feature birds in a lot of my fantasy paintings.  I love the free flowing form of them in flight and I especially love their wings.  I love painting their wings.  I also love the idea of the birds being able to move so easily from place to place.  Ahhh... what I would do if I could only fly!

Currently, the most significant thing is how the expression of the birds made their way into some of the final words I had with my Mom before she passed away in May 2011.  When my Mom could no longer speak, I told her to, "fly high and like a bird when you are ready Mom.  Just fly."  Now whenever I see a bird, I think of her and feel that maybe she is around me.  Soon, I will be starting a new blog about my my Mom and my relationship with her.  It will be titled, MY MOM MATTERS and it will feature all the memories, stories and poignant things that have entered my life since I found my Mom.  It will surely be chockfull of so many experiences, some joyful, some profound and some very emotional and sad. So, keep checking back for a post about the opening of this new blog.