Welcome to my website and blog. This site is about self discovery and explores the question "how did one 'clunk' on the head 6 years ago by a huge 10lb. ceramic vase unlock the doors for me to develop a passion for oil painting and mixed media collage?" Was it a coincidence or a divine, greater master plan from the gods of the creative universe? As Picasso once said, "Art is lies that tell the truth". So... was it a chance occurrence, a calling or destiny... you be the judge!
THE SIMPLE DISGUISE
OIL ON CANVAS 24 x 30
(c) Loren Fidalgo 2009
This is one of my favorite paintings because I love the different angles and the subject matter. I am also smitten with the colors. It's a 24 x 30 size painting. I like to use this size for class paintings and sometimes when I am painting on my own. The title, 'The Simple Disguise' is somewhat of a mystery to this painting.
I remember when I was beginning to paint this piece and I was really charged up and looking to seriously express something. I just didn't know what. At the moment that I put the paint to the scary white canvas, I was a woman on a mission, a rebel without a cause ( can a woman be a rebel, I'm not sure?) but anyhow, as I worked the paint around, I found my groove. I became aware to the idea that I was able to make a bunch of sense from the nonsense I was feeling. This painting asks you to look closely at it and it just might help answer it's meaning. I don’t like to talk about the deeper meaning to my work and how it reflects my secret world or life, as we all don’t. So, you won’t find the answer to the exact meaning of this painting, however, since I am talking about nonsense, it brings me back to the title of this painting, 'The Simple Disguise'. It is such a topic of conversation for people who view this work. "What does it mean"? But the curiosity is not whether I have a simple disguise or if you might have one? It’s about why we have one? I have come to believe that we all do but in different ways. I am reminded of a song by Bruce Springsteen titled, ‘The Brilliant Disguise’. His lyrics in this song speak to me and make me think about the public face and the private face that we all might have. Again, do all of us really have a disguise? I'm not so sure how many of us do, but I'll bet that it is more common than people believe or will admit. And as for my disguise, keep looking because it might reveal itself to you when you are not expecting it to. But for now, I think it is something for me to think about and to ponder, as I always do. I search for the simple disguise in myself often and try to figure out how it does it's thing in my life. How about your disguise and it's purpose in your life?
This is one of my favorite paintings and I wanted to share it with you, here on my blog. I really love the colors and the images of the ladies lips and the single flower. It is quite a large painting 30 x40 and is really dynamic when viewed in person. The title, ‘THE FEAR OF CHOOSING’, really reflects an inner struggle that I often feel, when faced with too many choices.
Have you ever had THE FEAR OF CHOOSING? I know I have the fear in some areas of my life. Well, how great is the feeling when I finally do choose something and I feel like my mind is uncluttered and the struggle has ceased? I love when I am at a crossroads with a decision and I finally feel that internal push over the fence and then BANG!... the decision or choice is made.
One way I have recently been trying to attack making creative choices and decisions is to carry a small pad of paper, with a small little pen. Whenever I am overloaded with intense creative ideas or choices, I try to write them down in the pad. I write down the pros and cons and ask myself, "how is choosing one decision over another, going to improve my life or get me where I want to go?" If it doesn't fit with my goals, I realize I have to let it go. After, just listing these points by writing them down, I am seeing that I really feel as sense of peace and less blogged (hee, hee) down. Also, after writing down my options, I can put the pad away and let ideas settle in my mind for a while. After I get away from it for some time, the choice sometimes reveals itself. I have also been using this method with images, painting ideas and inventive kind of things that are stirring in my mind. I sketch them out and then I can see where I want to go and what ideas to abandon. I can more clearly see my direction and whether something is a good choice or not. But I think the act of choosing might be a much more simpler one.
Once, I realize that there is no perfect choice, it makes my choosing much easier. It’s just the fear of making the choice that is the struggle. Deciding on something can be challenging as it is some times for me, but it can be done by realizing that there are many good and great ways to do some thing. Choosing can be such a personal thing because our decisions are backed up by all this history about ourselves. This history is stored in our brains all out lives. What might be the right choice for me, may not be the right choice for you. I think for me it is overcoming some fear I have at times to abandon my fear and go for it.. I am choosing in my life to let things happen and to ‘just choose’.