SEASCAPES, TIME AND NEW FRIENDS

'WHAT GOES ON AND ON'   12 5/8 x 3 1/2  acrylic on 1/8 inch matte board  (c) Loren Fidalgo 2016

                   

'STILL WATERS'      7 x 5        acrylic on matte board      (c) Loren Fidalgo 2016

                    SEASCAPES ARE ALL ABOUT 'TIME'

I am lovin' the process of painting these seascapes on 1/8 inch matte board.  The paint just glides across the surface and it lends itself to my process and technique perfectly.   Lately, I have been obsessed with time again .  Time passing, time ahead, time past and how much time is left.  These seascapes really let me get into the physical expression and energy as I try to put my message down on the board as quickly as I can so the paint does not dry before I've made my mark.   These seascapes are all about time in every way I can think of.        Time, time, time it's all about time.

                               
GIRLFRIENDS

Some fun news...I've been developing the beginnings of a wonderful friendship with a woman I've met at Fleisher Art Memorial.  Her name is Nina.  She is a fellow painter   (Abstract Expressionist).  Nina started painting at age 60 and is rocking the painting to the ma!.  You can see her work on her site   www.ninahopenklein.com    Her work is super and I think you will love it especially if you love abstract paintings.  We've been sharing information, tips and leads to help what I call 'our painting business'.  Nina had two pieces exhibited in Philadelphia at a studio/gallery industrial building for artists.  Her pieces looked great on the wall among about 60 other artists.  Nina, you go girl!!!
Cheers my friends,
Loren

NEW PAINTING WITH LOTS OF EMOTION & ENERGY

 Hey guys...it's Loren here.  I wanted to share this painting titled 'REALITY IN MOTION'  12 x 8 acrylic on canvas.  I created it about two months ago.  What I really love about this painting is the energy and emotion it evokes in me and other viewers.  I find this work to be such a freeing expression with the paint marks. It is quite a different technique that I usually use with most of my other paintings.  I used a palette knife for the entire painting as I usually do.  The day I painted this piece, I was in a fairly okay mood and I was eager to get started on this canvas because the landscape size proportion is so different than I am used to.

Usually, when I paint or create something, I have some idea on how I want to create what is in my mind.  With this piece, I didn't know where I was going and how I was going to get there.  I used a lot of loose strokes and I painted very quickly. I just love, love, love the freedom I had when painting this quickly.  I think I will incorporate this technique and looseness into my future paintings.  I want to be able to capture the same state of mind, too.  I believe the trick is to change it up by using an unusual size canvas. I think it makes it so that I will have to think differently about composition and mark making.

Well, that wraps up this post.  Leave a comment if you would like to.  I love to know what you are thinking?
Cheers,
Loren

NEW 'on my EASEL' PAINTING TALKED ABOUT

Time for a new 'on my EASEL' painting to be discussed on my blog. This is where I talk about what went into creating a painting.  Basically, it is about how and why I created this featured painting..

'SEARCHING FOR MEANING'   oil on canvas  18x24   (c) Loren Fidalgo 2010 

The painting I am writing about is titled, 'SEARCHING FOR MEANING'.  It is 18x24 and oil on canvas. I really enjoyed creating this piece and I liked the opportunity to dig deep into what goes into the struggle when one is looking for purpose in their life'.  I believe that the seeking and searching may be something that most of us go through some time in our lives. Whether it be addiction to drugs, alcohol, mental illness, emotional loss of a loved one, divorce or trauma or just simple 'existential questioning'.  We may ask ourselves questions... we may tell ourselves what seems to be lies that "we can handle it." With this painting, I am asking, "How do we find the reason? How do we find joy in life, when things are not going our way or we are in pain? How do we find hope?" 

When I began this painting, I had a strong image in my mind about what I wanted to express.  I had the concept in my thoughts about a woman and her struggle to find the reasons for living and why she is here. I wanted to express how it is usually the little things in life that are often missed when one is depressed and feeling like there is no hope. Elements like the flower and butterfly were thought of to  help portray my concept.  I wanted to depict this idea by playing off of a simple phrase that is often said to someone to let them know how they are not valuing the simple things in life.  'Take time to smell the flowers'.  Possibly, people might think that one is not grateful for the little things and they need to take the time to look and see what is right in front of them? For this woman, to smell the flowers is her symbolic way to express her desire to feel what she is missing, the 'joy of life'. She is looking, seeking, hoping and longing. 

 I painted this in a subtle cubist like style and use thick, textured paint. The cubist style helped me to convey the ambivalence that this woman is having in her life.  The woman's eyes are disjointed and each one is looking back out at 'YOU'. This is her way of saying, "I see you, I'm looking at you looking at me and I see that you are wondering what is wrong with me and you are wondering, "why I am 'searching for meaning?" I decided to depict her nude so she is in her most vulnerable and fragile state. The colors I chose are purples, greens, oranges, yellows and reds.  I like the way the colors interact with each other, such as the oranges and greens and purples and yellows.  I used a palette knife to sculpt this entire painting. I stroked the knife on the canvas, moving it in many directions as I carved into the paint. You can see this in the swirls of her hair and the texture in her body.

 In closing about this painting,, the question is inevitably asked, "Does this woman find her meaning?  Well, that is for you to decide.  What do you think?

 I hope you enjoyed the in-depth look into this piece?  If you would like to, please leave a comment or question.  Thanks for reading this post and stay tuned in for the next one.

Cheers,

Loren

The 2013 ANNUAL FRIENDS AND FAMILY CHRISTMAS CARD DESIGN REVEALED

Hey guys...it's time to reveal the new Christmas Card Design for 2013.  The cards have all been sent out and hopefully opened by now, so I can show you what I have been up to!

This design was inspired by a expression that my Gram who passed away last year,  would often say when she was confused or trying to focus on something.  She would get mildly frustrated and say, "Wait, wait. I'm all balled up!" I always thought it was so funny when she would say it.   I never knew exactly what she meant when I was growing up, but now I surely do and so does this 'funny snowman'.

The card design was created by hand with black ink.  It was then scanned into the computer and the colors were added to it. I really struggled to get all of the elements to look right and also fit into an envelope at the same time.  I shuffled some things around, cut and paste and found a good place for everything. This 'funny guy' was then cleaned up some and printed out onto card stock to check it out. When all was good, I took them to my printer guy 'Joe' who had me email a copy of the file to him. He printed them out, all on one side on white card stock. They were waiting for me when I picked them up and they looked so cute all in one stack. Now I knew I had to get a move on. 

I knew I had to get down to work because I did not have much time to get them completed and mailed out, too.  I began by cutting them out all the way around the image with scissors leaving a small white border. Little papers were everywhere.  Next I scored and folded them into 3 panels.  The first panel reads, 'I've been a snowman all my life...' The second reads 'but this Christmas has me...' The third reads, 'all balled up! and 'Happy Holidays to you!'  It's kind of confusing to write it out this way, so looking at the photos will surely help.  The card was finally adorned with some colored glitter then left to dry.  When they were done, I started to address them and put them in the envelopes.

Everything about this 'funny snowman' but his hat and one boot is dishelved and out of place.  I thought that this truly reflects what my Gram was saying when she felt overwhelmed.  I know my family and friends and those who knew Gram will surely know what this card is about.  So the next time you get confused or frustrated, just say out loud or to yourself, "I'm all balled up!"  Maybe you will remember this card?

Below are some more photos...

Well, I hope you like this year's design and find that it ranks somewhere up at the top?  Feel free to leave a comment.  I'd love to read what you think.

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to all.

Cheers, 

Loren

'ON MY EASEL' HOW I CREATE MY ART

Hey, folks.  I'm starting a new section on my blog called 'on my EASEL'.  This will feature new work that I will be creating, as well as recent abstract work from 2012 and some earlier works that I have yet to feature on my blog. I thought to create this section to share with you the whys, the whats and the hows about my process of painting. The hows and whys about  coming up with the ideas, colors, forms and the how I approach a painting from technique to thought process.  

I think an artist's thought process is so important to get to know the artist's inner soul.  It helps you to get to know how the artists thinks and feels.  I thought I would like to start this section to give you a 'play by play' of the world that I go into when I am creating.  I will talk about what I am inspired by.  It could be colors, shapes, memories of certain experiences, patterns and emotions/feelings. conversations with other people, reading, looking out my windows at nature and so on...  For me, when I am approaching a conceptual piece it always starts with a feeling or idea in my mind.  When painting abstract, it starts with some things more ambiguos like colors, shapes and patterns that I am imagining in my head.  Some days are  feeling like a yellow day and some days a crimson day and so on.... Some times I see a beautiful color and need to paint it out to see how it feels. Some times circles or squares keep nagging at me until I put the paint on the canvas. I never know what will capture my attention and be in the fore front of my mind when I am painting or creating anything so follow along with me as I try to explain my unexplainable process of creating art.

Check back to see what's 'on my EASEL'.  I hope to see you here again!

Cheers, Loren

WHERE I'VE BEEN

'HEAVY HEART'    24x30       2012    oil on canvas

I have not posted on this blog for some time now.  I would like to share where I have been and why I have been there.   I have not been writing mainly because I have been in a process of grieving the loss of my precious Mom who passed away last May 6 th. I have been heart broken and filled with sorrow about her passing.  You can read more about her here on her blog.  From the pain and the sorrow it has been very hard to write and organize my thoughts and emotions.  I have been a bit 'stuck' and I have struggled with a blank palette in my mind.  I never realized how much a loss would effect my ability to write and be creative at it, as well.  Although I have been painting this entire year, I never realized how much it would effect my ability to write effectively.  Over this year, I would sit down in front of my computer, open my blog and completely draw a 'blank' inside.  I did not know where to begin.  Ideas were few and hard to come by.  Anxiety started to creep in and the emptiness in my mind became a a real obstacle to writing creatively.  The longer I failed to blog, the harder it became to write.  This cycle went round and round for almost a year.  Can you believe it has been a year?  Well, as time went by, I began to ask myself questions about "how do I begin again to offer inspiration and ideas to anyone when I have not been able to write and express myself and because I have been away from blogging for so long?"   The angst grew more profound for sometime until I finally had a moment of clarity and insight into my own creative thought process.

'SAD, SAD GIRL'      16x20     2011      oil on canvas

 For the past year, even though I was unable to write, I have been painting a lot.  I don't know for certainty why this had been this way, however I do have some ideas about it as I am trying to find the answers as to why writing is so much more of a struggle.  This is what I learned. As I mentioned, I have been painting furiously over this last year however, when it came to expressing my thoughts in writing, it was more difficult, more raw, more open. I guess that through the written word, somehow the reality of my loss seemed to be more real, more true. In art visually, sometimes I find I can hide behind the work, with a 'simple disguise' of sorts but with writing it is just out there.  When I write it is real and coming from the unconscious and unconscious at the same time.  If I were to want to express the pain I am feeling, and I were to write , "I am in pain", that becomes a fact for me just by the act of writing it.  Visually however, allows for that same feeling to be disguised like a woven tapestry with images, shapes and colors and even though it is meant to express the same emotion as something I have written. Visually, it is left to interpretation but in writing, for me, 'it is what it is'.   This is my idea about why for me, writing is so much more difficult and challenging.

'GRIEF AND A BIRD'    18x24       2011      oil on canvas

I've mentioned that I did do a lot of painting, I was able to work in a friend's studio in Philadelphia over the summer and even though I was bouncing around a lot with my ideas, I did manage to produce some interesting new work. Visually I was still able to work creatively.  Although I was thoroughly into my painting, and I was not blogging, I had no idea what the end of the summer would bring in my life and how it would effect my ability to write even more then it previously had. 

Sadly, at the end of the summer, my beloved Gram, ('little Gram' as family all knew her), and the woman who raised me and my siblings, passed away on August 27th.  This loss has hit me so hard and fast and again I was finding myself so paralyzed and unable to make sense out of anything for these past 4 months.  (You can read more about my Gram here , here and here. )  Although I have suffered these losses, what I have come to realize is that I can try to use writing to heal the heart just as I use painting to soothe my soul.  I know I need to get back to writing and share my story, so it is not so raw, so painful.   I am learning that I can use my writing as a way of healing and not shut down from my experiences.  I have come to understand that I need to share this part of my life and at the same time offer my art and inspiration outward.  The two creative processes can coexist. I am struggling but I'm pulling through.  I have also come to realize that I was sheltering myself and hiding away while trying to get some soothing from the two major losses that has happened so close together.  I have been trying to make sense out of nonsense and this can be a never ending challenge and struggle.

'REACHING,  GRASPING,  HOPING'         2012           24x30   oil on canvas

I am ready to begin again along with my losses, sorrows and heart brake to share my experiences on this blog if the moment or time calls for it.  This way I am not boxed in to just write about my work but to share how I am doing along with my work and creative inspiration. I hope I can write about what and how my heart asks me to. 

Thanks to everyone who has come to my blog waiting for a new post. Thanks for giving me this time to finding healing and find my footing. Thanks for reading because this is my story. This is where I've been.  

PAINTING A SIMPLE DISGUISE

THE SIMPLE DISGUISE
OIL ON CANVAS 24 x 30
(c) Loren Fidalgo 2009

This is one of my favorite paintings because I love the different angles and the subject matter. I am also smitten with the colors.  It's a 24 x 30 size painting.  I like to use this size for class paintings and sometimes when I am painting on my own.  The title, 'The Simple Disguise' is somewhat of a mystery to this painting.

I remember when I was beginning to paint this piece and I was really charged up and looking to seriously express something.  I just didn't know what.  At the moment that I put the paint to the scary white canvas, I was a woman on a mission, a rebel without a cause ( can a woman be a rebel, I'm not sure?) but anyhow, as I worked the paint around, I found my groove. I became aware to the idea that I was able to make a bunch of sense from the nonsense I was feeling.  This painting asks you to look closely at it and it just might help answer it's meaning.  I don’t like to talk about the deeper meaning to my work and how it reflects my secret world or life, as we all don’t.  So, you won’t find the answer to the exact meaning of this painting, however, since I am talking about nonsense, it brings me back to the title of this painting, 'The Simple Disguise'.  It is such a topic of conversation for people who view this work. "What does it mean"?  But the curiosity is not whether I have a simple disguise or if you might have one?  It’s about why we have one?  I have come to believe that we all do but in different ways.  I am reminded of a song by Bruce Springsteen titled, ‘The Brilliant Disguise’.  His lyrics in this song speak to me and make me think about the public face and the private face that we all might have.  Again, do all of us really have a disguise?  I'm not so sure how many of us do, but I'll bet that it is more common than people believe or will admit.  And as for my disguise, keep looking because it might reveal itself to you when you are not expecting it to.  But for now, I think it is something for me to think about and to ponder, as I always do. I search for the simple disguise in myself often and try to figure out how it does it's thing in my life. How about your disguise and it's purpose in your life? 


Cheers,
Loren

A NEW TO YOU YET SOMEWHAT OLDER PAINTING

THE BEAT OF THE HEART
OIL ON CANVAS  30x40
(c) Loren Fidalgo 2010

 I wanted to touch base with everyone and share a new yet old painting.  This painting is called "THE BEAT OF THE HEART". Initially, I wanted to title it, "THE WATCHER", however, I decided that the new title expresses more of my feelings about this painting.  What do you think?  

This painting is painted with oil on stretched canvas.  The size is 30 x 40 and one of my favorite sizes to paint on.

I feature birds in a lot of my fantasy paintings.  I love the free flowing form of them in flight and I especially love their wings.  I love painting their wings.  I also love the idea of the birds being able to move so easily from place to place.  Ahhh... what I would do if I could only fly!

Currently, the most significant thing is how the expression of the birds made their way into some of the final words I had with my Mom before she passed away in May 2011.  When my Mom could no longer speak, I told her to, "fly high and like a bird when you are ready Mom.  Just fly."  Now whenever I see a bird, I think of her and feel that maybe she is around me.  Soon, I will be starting a new blog about my my Mom and my relationship with her.  It will be titled, MY MOM MATTERS and it will feature all the memories, stories and poignant things that have entered my life since I found my Mom.  It will surely be chockfull of so many experiences, some joyful, some profound and some very emotional and sad. So, keep checking back for a post about the opening of this new blog.

MY HEAD INJURY AND MYSTERIOUS OBSESSION WITH PAINTING

As I have been wanting to do, I would like to share some more info with you about the head injury I had some 3 years ago. In a nutshell, I had a huge, at least 7-10  lb. ceramic vase/vessel fall on the top of my head or "clunked" me on the head, while I was loading some pottery on a wobbly shelf.   If you are interested to learn more about how it happened, check out the post in my blog MIND GIGGLES TM.  There you will get the details of the accident before and after it happened.

THE SECRET
OIL ON CANVAS 30x40 
(c) Loren Fidalgo 2010
Since the "clunk" on the head,, I have had an addition and change in the direction of my creative passion and interests.  Prior head injury, I was primarily passionate about graphic arts, and illustration.  I was mainly pursuing a career in art licensing working with pastels and colored pencil. I never thought of painting as a medium for myself and I was not interested in the fine arts as a career.  But, something changed in me after the injury, some thing that I do not have an explanation for.  Although, I  still working on illustration and graphics, I have begun to furiously start painting and working in mixed media.  The ideas for painting have been coming from my heart.    Some time soon after the injury, I signed up for a painting, drawing and watercolor class which was "odd" for me, and although I was painting still lives in class, which I now loved (also odd for me) I was painting images from a deeper place in my heart at home from a deeper place in my heart.  You can see some of these still life paintings here and my fantasy paintings here. 

After being "clunked" on the head,  I have found that I want to create more meaningful and thoughtful images and pieces of art.  I am much more interested in expressing my emotions in my work.  I feel compelled to express my deeper feelings, thoughts and ideas.  I have made changes and choices in the ideas for paintings and mixed media works and they have also taken a turn in subject matter. Although, I have always been strongly interested in concept and ideas,  I have now become interested in expression of feelings and life experiences.  This is an amazement to me.  I have been shocked at the depth of my despair at times that has been coming out of my heart and soul and portrayed in my work. I find myself compelled now to express not only my joyful and exuberant feelings but now my sorrow, depression, pain and challenging feelings about my life in a way that I did not know existed. I am having to face and question some of my experiences of my life presently and as most artists do at some time, I am also facing experiences from my childhood traumas.  (UGGHH!!! this is a topic that in full is still too deep to share here).  Although I am not one to often wear my deep feelings of sorrow on my sleeve, and share it with others, I am for some reason expressing it in my paintings and art. Go figure! 

SEARCHING FOR MEANING
OIL ON CANVAS 18x24
(c) Loren Fidalgo 2010

 So as you see, things have changed creatively for me and I am just hanging on for the ride.  I wonder if anyone has experienced this same sort of shift in consciousness and focus from an accident or head injury?  I was "clunked" on the left side on top of my head and since I did not show signs of a concussion, it appeared that nothing was injured internally.  The only signs and symptoms are these changes in my obsession with painting and mixed media, and a change in my perception of color. which I talk about it in my blog MIND GIGGLES TM  So, as I have said, "Is my huge obsession with painting a coincidence or a direct result from being "clunked" on the head from a 6 lb ceramic vase? You be the judge."